Nina Louise Jantzen Chapel Hill, Carrboro, North Carolina North Carolina

First let me say first and foremost, I absolutely, totally blame my stupid husband for the state of our relationship in the past 13 years, I blame him for the pain to my children and myself due to his selfish, arrogant, immature decisions he made on his own. However, I am posting my story because the skanky loser who for whatever reason, thinks she has been in a relationship for past 13 years with the fool, would get off scot free not being accountable to her part in breaking up a 25 year marriage and all the pain she contributed to myself and my children. Now that my marriage is over, I feel that everyone should know how this ugly, selfish, skanky, piece of ass whore, inflicted herself into mine and my childrens lives secretly.Where to start, 13 yrs. ago I found out my husband was having an affair with this thing he hired to be his onsite project secretary. We had a construction company and he did the actual work and hiring while my office was in the house taking care of all the bookkeeping, billing, insurance, bids, basically, everything else except the construction work itself. I also at the time had a 5 yr. old and 2 yr. old, while I was raising them, taking care of them, running to schools, playdate, doctor appts, being room mom for the classes, etc. There was many a time I was in my office at 2 and 3 in the morning so that I could be mom for my kids. This was my choice and I loved doing it so I’m not complaining, however, I think that is why my idiot husband allowed himself to be in the position for the affair to begin. Lets face it, I was probably not giving him the ego stroking he needed and she provided, but heck, we were already married 11 years. I thought I was killing myself trying to play all the parts so we would have something later down the line. At this time, I wasn’t paying myself anything. We plain didn’t have the money for paying company bills and house bills. Anyway he hired Nina Louise Jantzen (hereafter called the loser, whore, skank, you get the drift). They met at the rundown low income apts where she lived (obviously not working) with her daughter (yup, you guessed it, shes never been married) when husband (hereafter called stupid, idiot, ass, cheater and my favorite, liar.) The skank came outside and asked if the idiot was looking for any help. She told him she is a single mom and he felt this would be great seeing that this was turning out to be a much larger and detailed project, so he hired her for a little over min wage. Of course told me about her would often come home talking about stupid things they talked about. I wasn’t a jealous person and after 2 kids, and 11 years, thought our marriage was solid so I didn’t really mind. After all, she knew he was married and had no problem cashing the full time weekly payroll checks printed up and signed by me. After a month or so I laughed and asked him if he was attracted to her because he brought her name up more and more, and he was like no way, he laughed and started saying how she just wasn’t an attractive thing and not real bright, but was fun to cut up with. This is where I was the idiot, but really didn’t think this was anything I had to worry about. Well after being with my husband for over 12 years already, I felt I knew this man completely. I just knew that he would never hurt me like that. The only so called friends he made was people who worked for him. He identified himself as a man by his job. He has no hobbies, no interests except watching TV, no other friends other than the losers who worked for him and looked up to him as boss man. He gave money out freely if one of them came to him with sob story. Needless to say we did have several arguments over the years because of this generosity, especially since he had no clue to our company or personal finances because I took care of those. Well, this loser Nina was no different. Sob story, single mom, no money, kids father is worthless, no skills, no degree, nothing but poor me, but I guess she knows how to open her legs for someone to”help her out”. In other words – by the book whore. Well, after a few months my husband started acting different. He would like start arguments with me and started coming home late, etc., we all know the flags… My friends and mom even ask me if I thought he was having affair or something. I would answer that he would never hurt me like that (dummy me truly thought that) but after a few more weeks of this much change, I wanted to meet the”onsite” secretary. Every time I told the lying cheater I was coming to job site he would get mad and tell me I was going to cause problems. He needed me in the office to take care of this or that. Things were getting worse between us. I just thought it was because we were losing money big time on this project because owners of complex wasn’t paying like they should have. I was getting really scared, we went through our credit lines and now we would risk the house. I would tell him our financial situation and bitched to him and begged him to stop working on complex until we got paid up to date. Better to make no money then lose more due to expenses like payroll, materials, subs, gas, etc.On 12/13/2000 was the day I found evidence of their affair. It’s fair to say he didn’t trade up. Like many I found it through cell phone records. I didn’t confront either of them that day because I wanted to get some things done to try to protect myself and my children. I felt like the ground opened up and I couldn’t get balance, shock of course, but this rocked me to my very core. How many times do people say the woman is the last to know… I still had to act normal for my kids until my head stopped reeling. The next 12 hours I took care of things like cancelling cc, moving bank accts, getting names of attorneys and making an appointment, changing locks at home, etc. Husband knew something was different with me that night and didn’t make his usual nightly calls in garage like he did before. The coward went to bed. First thing next morning after taking kids to schools, I confronted husband on phone and of course, he denied everything. Tried to tell me I was just looking for something. Told him I was firing his whore immediately and he had to find somewhere to go, my home was not open to him at this moment. I called loser (at her home, because at this point, she wasn’t working on jobsite I learned later, for she was at her home number throughout the day and night) and told her she was fired immediately. That dumb thing had balls to ask why. I told her that her position is done and her services would no longer be needed. Can you believe she tried to apply for unemployment that next work day… like I would let that go through. She called husband after hanging up with me and told him I fired her and could I do that. He had to say yes, I own 50% of our business. Later that day got mom to watch my children while I went to attorney to start separation papers. I had always said I would never put up with cheating and couldn’t think of anything else. That whole day and night he was trying to talk, leaving messages that I was crazy, it’s not what I think, they are just friends, telling me how much he loved me, crying, pleading for me to talk and work thing out. We all could write the playbook on things said when caught. Truly textbook.Well here it is 10 days before my daughters 3rd birthday and xmas and my mind on overdrive. My children didn’t know what happened but knew something bad was going on because mommy was crying in other room and would hear anger in my voice when speaking to daddy. I tried so hard to just keep things normal and it breaks my heart that I just couldn’t pull it off. After a couple of days I let him in house to talk. It was your typical conversation for something like this, but bottom line he begged to come back home, swore it was over with the loser, agreed to counseling, blah blah blah. Maybe it’s an excuse, but knowing our financial situation was not good at the time, believing that after 12 years and 2 kids together and seeing how pissed and hurt I was, plus seeing that I was not someone who would stand for this so I thought, I let him back in (to sleep on futon) and agreed to try to work things out. Honestly, having a 5 and 3 year old, I was plain scared not to try. When he came back into house, there was the “honeymoon” period, but needless to say, I was pissed.Ok, for next year we went to couples counseling, went through hell because she was an employee (I know, hahaha) had her on all my business report taxes and payroll records so I had to keep being reminded that he let me sign full time paychecks to this loser whore (SOMETHING I WILL NEVER get over) I was also being my own detective for several years making sure there was no contact, starting to pay myself so I could have a few dollars of my own, and basically thinking this was a horrible mistake, thought I got how it started and we could get our marriage back to a decent place. All this time, I always felt like that skanky, loser was in the background. It was just a gut feeling. I couldn’t find any evidence of that and told myself that it was just me being paranoid. Idiot husband was telling me that I need to get over this, it’s over, he said he was sorry; I was not letting this go, etc. (as well as counselor telling me I was obsessing and had to move on) eventually (after about 3 years) let the obsessive detective work I was doing die down. I found out later from the skanks sister that her own father cheated on her mother and it broke up their marriage, so she knows first hand what families and woman go through. I’m sure it’s not fun to watch, I hate my kids had to because of them. Fast forward 7 years from that horrible day. Our marriage doing OK, kids growing up and doing great, business is back and doing wonderful, going on vacations as a family and as a couple, basically best revenge by living well. 2 days before my b-day and week away from thanksgiving (and husband’s 50th bday on thanksgiving to boot) I see some phone calls (lots and lots of phone calls) in a detail phone bill. Husband wasn’t there at the moment and I called the number. Well guess who it was, I got that things voicemail. My knees buckled, head reeling, shock set in while I kept looking at this piece of paper I know what it sounds like but this truly came out of nowhere! (hence, beating myself up for so many years for being stupid and trusting) when stupid walked through door after a few minutes, to take me for lunch and planning a romantic weekend (this after just hanging up with the loser before he walked through door come to find out) he comes in all happy go lucky, not a care in the world, smiling… Until he sees the shock on my face. He asks me what’s wrong, if I was hurt, etc. I go to where he stood at the door and punched him in the mouth and started screaming whose number was this. He said it was his brothers, so I punched him in the mouth again. Each time he lied, I kept punching him until he grabbed my neck to hold me back from being able to reach him with my fists. (I do have to say at this point, we have never had any violence or verbal or physical altercations between us ever, he could have hurt me if he wanted to, but he just held me back from trying my best to see blood run down his face) I started screaming and asking if this has been going on for past 7 years, of course, he said no. Told me it was nothing but calls, someone to talk to, just friends, blah, blah, blah.I got in my car and drove home but first straight to her house. I wanted some answers and thought it high time we met. To give credit where due, she opened the door when she asked who it was and I said, your boyfriends wife. I asked her if this has been going on for past 7 years and she said same as him, they saw each other at a gas station a few months earlier and just started talking again. Told me that she considered him a good friend and had the balls to ask me why they couldn’t stay friends. As I said, she’s not real bright. She told me she doesn’t have any friends or family around and her daughter didn’t want much to do with her, stayed away from home. Shocking right. Stupid is burning up my phone trying to get me to answer since I left him, when my phone rang while I was in her nasty, smelly home, I told her to answer it. The bitch starts off with “hi honey, she’s here”When I start screaming why is she calling you honey and the loser waves her hand says she calls everyone honey, as no big deal and my idiot husband backs her up! Later in the week, I even sent her pictures of my children and wrote, these are the people you both are hurting, it’s not just me! Please stop this relationship, nobody will win and everyone will be hurt.I got home, had locks changed again on house, called my old counselor, and just cried. The lying cheat asked to come over the next day to talk; dummy me let him in, mainly so I could just go off on him. He’s trying to tell me he’s not going to talk to her again, they are just friends, blah blah. Needless to say, I’m in shock, in hell, pissed, basically shaken down to the core of my being yet again and it’s with the same skanky whore I thought was long gone. I went back to my counselor and tried to get my head from spinning again. This time my girls were 12 and 10 and financially we were in a better place. He begged and pleaded to come back in house, for me to forgive him, let him show me I’m the only one, yeah yeah, heard it before didn’t I. Like I said, it was a few days before thanksgiving and his 50th bday and a few weeks before we were to leave on a special family vacation to celebrate his bday we had been planning for about a year. To this day, I don’t know why I did let him back in the house (I never gave him a new key to my home to this day), I feel like this was one of the biggest mistakes I did to myself by not throwing him out for good.Then 6/15/08, father’s day, he was out and I tried to call him on cell phone to ask him something. He didn’t answer and me being still in detective mode went into his voicemail to listen to messages like I have several times over past 7 months, who is there a message from. Yup, that thing he calls a friend. Talking about a bunch of nothing, but asking if he was upset because of the water bill and ended this 5 min. message with I love you. This came from out of nowhere again, and threw me for a loop. I knew what was going to happen when he got home and called my mom to pick up my other child. Meanwhile I was throwing his crap into trash bags so he could take them with him when I threw him out. When he got back about 15 mins later, he and my mom pulled up at same time to pick up my daughter. The idiot knew something was desperately wrong and we walked in house and I let him know that his piece of shit friend left him a lovely message, especially how it ended and how she didn’t say thank you for paying some water bill for her. I threw his crap down the steps towards front door. He pinned me in the stairs while I was hitting and punching and screaming. Of course denial of everything. I started kicking and screaming to take his crap in trash bags and go to his trash friend. He immediately tried to call me from his truck wanting to talk. Hahaha, funny how a cheater wants to “talk” when caught. After that he stayed at motels and over next several days I retained a very good, very expensive attorney to start divorce papers. I told my kids later that daddy can’t live with me anymore, they would be able to see him or talk to him anytime they wanted to. Nothing was going to change, we were still Mom and Dad. This was husband/wife stuff. I knew they would blame me, that’s how he got me to let him back in house the past November. This went on until end of August, all the while telling me that he has had no contact with the skank, she kept calling him, he’s so sorry, he misses me, pleaded to come back home, yeah, yeah, yeah. My daughters 13th bday is in late August and we planned her first boy/girl party at the clubhouse in our neighborhood. The afternoon on the day of party we were all at clubhouse getting it ready. I was on ladder putting up decorations and wouldn’t you know I fell off the damn ladder. Thought it was just broken ankle cause I couldn’t move my leg. Had to get an ambulance and as I was being wheeled out I told my family I’d be back in a couple of hours, needed to get cast and crutches (and pain meds!!!). Went to hospital and they took x-ray’s and damn if I didn’t crush my tibia. (big ball part of bone that connects to knee) I was so out of it because of pain meds I didn’t know they took me to a trauma hospital and by the time I knew what was happening somewhat, the party was supposed to be in full swing. Thank god for my friends because my idiotic husband has no clue about what to do giving a party. After party was cleaned up he came straight to hospital. The orthopedic doc came in about 2 am and tried to explain to me (us) what the injury was and what needed to be done to repair it. I was going to be off my feet for next 12 weeks or so, I was facing at least 2 surgeries in that time, then another 7-8 months after that with recovery, and getting back up to walking again. All I really understood at that time was I was going to be down for some time and I kept saying I am so screwed. I looked at the cheating liar and said I have no choice but to ask you to come back in house. He was very, very happy to oblige. I even said it had to be with the understanding that there could be no contact his loser friend, which he had been swearing on his and my children’s lives that it was over. That ugly, skanky thing was never going to be an issue again and he would work on getting my trust back and wanted his marriage. This all happened about a week before he was supposed to be getting served papers from my attorney. After coming home a few days later to recover from first surgery and wait for the next surgery to actually put in the pins and plates, my lying, cheating husband was wonderful. Took great care of me, hired help to come in to help me, took off from his work to help get the kids to wherever they needed to be, take care of household stuff, and plain making me feel that the only thing he wanted was for me to be comfortable and not worry about anything while I was down. After couple of weeks I started to warm up to him. Stopped putting f-ing piece of sh-t after his name in my head. I started seeing the man I married and fell in love with, not the lying, cheating, idiot that he became. I told him I wanted to work on our marriage, that we both had lots to fix and change, but I was ready if he still wanted the same things. Told him we had to do marriage counseling and we both needed help and we both needed to take a look within for how each of us messed this relationship up. Of course I made sure to say he couldn’t have ANY contact with that thing he calls a friend, she had to be gone for good, and he excitedly told me “already done” and said she has been gone since father’s day, the skank meant nothing to him and he loved me and wanted us to stay together, raise kids together grow old, blah, blah. So that’s what happened. We went to counseling (different counselor) for next 3 years, one of the main issues was trying to regain my trust and deal with my anger. When I said I needed him to call the loser and with me there and on speaker phone tell her he wants nothing to do with her, etc. He said he couldn’t do that and just didn’t want any communication with the skank. Looking back that should have been a huge red flag along with some other things, but I was trying to learn to trust him again, Dummy me, thought the nightmare was over, we started really enjoyed each other, thought our marriage and relationship really was going in right direction, going out and doing vacations as a couple, even looking and found my dream home. We had been going to marriage counseling for about 3 years at this point and we talked alot about the affair and what it did to me, to our kids, to our marriage, and to him. I kept asking over and over though, “how long”… never got an answer, or just got, “I already told you”. (again, should have been a HUGE red flag) I really thought we were going to be good. Because we found the dream home we were in negotiations for price and all. I pictured us so very happy there and said in counseling how I saw this as a new start and was excited to have that. I started going through our stuff trying to get a head start on packing once we agreed on price. It took longer than most because owners were in and out of county during this time, but I just knew we were getting our home. As I started throwing away papers and bill from our file cabinets for our company from years earlier I saw old cell phone bills with the call details on them. Saw that during all those years he was indeed having an affair. This was a huge betrayal because it was talked about lots and lots during counseling, during our private conversations, me asking over and over “how long”. He kept saying he was only in contact with the whore only a few months and only by phone and would get mad at me that “I wouldn’t let this go and how I needed to trust him and move on”, etc. Realizing I had the proof that it had been going on for all those years absolutely sent me into a spiral. I just plain shut down. I stopped negotiations on the new home, I went into a bad place (I knew that there was no more trying, marriage was over because I just was never the type of person who was going to be able to move on from that). I was only going through the motions on auto pilot, my kids had to go through watching me going through depression yet again, but this time was different. Everyone noticed and saw me getting worse by the week, many of my friends and our counselor started getting very concerned, because I am normally a very strong person and always had been. My lying, cheating ass of a husband was only one who acted like everything was ok. This went on for several months, however, even though I didn’t see any evidence or anything, I still had that nagging feeling in the pit if my stomach that the skanky whore Nina was still around. I had also told him that if I did see any evidence at all that he is in contact with that thing, he would be out before he could say goodbye, which he would say, fine, no problem, I’m not hiding anything. After the first of year (2011), still very depressed and still having that gut feeling, I looked up another land line he had, saw online that while he wasn’t making calls to loser (probably because he knew I was in detective mode big time) but online I could see the details of calls coming into that number from her number, several times daily and nightly. I almost felt better, I wasn’t nuts. He came home that night and I waited until the next morning once kids were out the door for school. I then asked if he had any contact with that piece of shit loser and of course, deny, deny, deny, trying to tell me I was crazy. I showed him the online page with several weeks of call details. He just said its only phone calls. I smiled and said it’s only your marriage and that’s now over (funny, I didn’t punch or anything this time, I guess I had the night to digest the information of being betrayed yet again) I opened the door and just said, bye. He knew there was no use saying anything at that point so he left and made sure he heard the deadbolt right behind him and thought, OK, this is it, no reason to not think there is anything to consider. This time for some reason I felt stronger, I just felt better. That night I told my children (separately) what happened, gave them the details of what I’ve been going through for past 10 years, not all the awful details, but explained why daddy had to leave several times and reasons he got back in house each time. That I tried to keep our family together. Now that they were older I felt they should know more of why their mother was going in and out of depression all these years and why I was so many times mad at their dad. It wasn’t a shock to either of them except for the fact it has been with same person and it went on for over 10 years. So many things suddenly understood! I explained to them this time it was over and asked what they thought. They both were so supportive to me. I could tell they felt better just knowing after all this time. Of course, the idiot started asking if he could come back into house, he has nowhere to go, I suggested he finally bite the bullet and be with his loser whore, she’s been bought and paid for, might as well use her. I told him he could see our kids anytime and the only thing he was going to lose was me. I kept reminding him that we have been counseling for over 3 years and all he did was lie, there was absolutely nothing to talk about, what the hell was he waiting for, go to the whore, leave me alone, you have my blessing. He said no, he didn’t want her, that if he wanted to be with her he would have already left me for her, didn’t care about her, just had her around for someone to talk to. Couldn’t believe how he could still have the balls to look at me much less our children who obviously didn’t matter that much either. I think he was staying at a hotel again for about a week, he would keep calling and wanted to meet to talk, I kept saying there was nothing to talk about. Afterall, we just pissed away over 11 grand for marriage counseling. Told him that if he told me sky was blue, I’m looking out a window because I trusted him that much. I finally agreed to meet him for coffee just to tell him stop calling and that nothing he said would make a difference. The lying, cheating fool told me I’m the only one he ever loved and wants to be with. It felt good when he asked to come back I just looked at him and said I think were done here and why would I believe you? You would think OK, that’s all folks, but no. Wouldn’t you know, about a week later his mother up and dies. Stupid cheater asked me if I would please help him with arrangements. After 24 years together, I felt I owed him at least that much. At the funeral, I looked at each person coming in waiting to see if the skank walked in. I had all intentions of pulling the bitch out by the hair on her head, didn’t care what anyone thought, but didn’t see her there. After the funeral I told him he could stay at house until he got his head together with her and funeral and will and estate, however, I made it clear, if I find any contact with the loser, he will be out of my house within 15 mins. Can you believe he was insulted that I even thought he would? My children told me later, separately, they thought I was wrong for letting him back in, now that they knew what I have dealt with already. That was a real surprise to me. I just told them, I have a lot of history with their father, he’s a nice guy, and I thought it would be better for them also. I made no secret that my marriage was over. I told him after his mother died that if he still wanted the construction company we own, buy me out or I would shut it down. I was not going to work together anymore. He said he didn’t have the money to buy me out, so 27 days later, after 22 years, I shut it down. I never wanted to be a bean counter in the first place!!!!For two years he stayed in the house, I have to say a lot of the reason is because he’s easy to have. There was no war zone. I would ask several times over this time, what are your plans, when are you moving out, suggesting he go to his loser friend, this marriage is done, etc. Each time he would act surprised and say, “I thought we would work things out, would say he didn’t want to leave, he wasn’t having anything to do with the loser” I admittedly was an iceberg; the walls were up, reinforced, and staying. He would many, many times try to get me to go away with him, have dates with him, have sex with him (ugh, the thought of that made my stomach turn so it was easy to pass on those offers – his small contribution has not been missed or considered memorable. The skank must not have a high bar in that area of her life along with everything else. Many times over this period, I would out and out ask, have you talked or seen your whore you call a friend. He would always say no, but I never believed him and he would actually get mad that I didn’t ever believe him.One day, March 3, 2013, at 1:00 in the morning, I was looking online at some banking (his banking), and low and behold what do I see. In one month, 5 different checks made out to Nina (whore, loser, skank) Jantzen. All cashed, I guess she doesn’t know what a bank account could be, in the total amount of over 2800.00. I wish I could say I was shocked, or pissed, (OK, I was pissed), or even hurt. I printed copies of the checks and he got up to use bathroom, I told him he was to leave NOW. He acted all confused and what’s the matter, what’s going on. I told him he knew – he could see I was struggling to not come at him, but I shook the pages I was holding in his face and told him he was out of here NOW, his crap would be on front porch by morning, he tried to grab the pages in my hand and yes, I cold cocked him one time. Got him right in the mouth, he could see that if he didn’t leave right then, I would actually get something better to hit him with at this point. I’m not proud of myself for acting like that – it’s sooooo not me, (and not proud, but my god it felt good), I’ve never hit anyone before, however, there is a constant denominator for those very few times I ever lost it like that, it’s that piece of shit he calls a friend. He left through the front door, I said don’t let the door hit your ass, while I shut it and he about fell down the stairs. (again a good feeling and nothing like making him leave at 1:18 in the morning, sticking to my word) While I was irritated my daughter didn’t clean out the litter box on a regular basis, it was perfect to go into it, break up some clump pieces and get some cat gifts and toss into the bags and suitcase along with his crap. Dogs lie with dogs, shit stays with shit. I made sure to fill all the jean pockets with a little bit of gravel so he could think about our sweet pets he also can’t live with anymore. I only wish I didn’t confront him so quickly, I would have had time to spray paint in a beautiful fuchsia pink, CHEATER on the sides of his truck he is so proud of.I told my children what happened, they were shocked and my youngest was very, very angry and said she loves him but doesn’t respect him. She told me she wants an explanation and an apology and is to this day, upset he has not given her either. Shocking right, when she told him she felt she deserved it, he just looked at her and changed the subject. My only comfort I could give her was that she deserved both and I hope one day, she’ll get what she needs from him. I did tell both kids that if they ever did meet the whore, they didn’t need to be polite to the loser that helped break up their parents marriage.He has never asked to come back in house after that morning, however, he looks for reasons to come and hang out and comes over to take kids out several times a week, but usually comes in house to see if I would talk to him. My cousin one day told me something that helped and changed my attitude since. She said, he wasn’t a good husband, but will be a very good ex-husband and I should think of him like that, and she’s right, he is a nice guy.They say the best revenge is to live well. Ok its taken 13 years of my life. Years I will never get back from all the pain and anger, but at least I am at this point of acceptance (still get pissed unfortunately, but working on that) but living my life on what makes me happy, content and satisfied. I’m posting this for New Years 2014, because after this gets posted I will not spend one more moment of my life thinking about this sorry excuse of a woman that my idiot fool of a husband still doesn’t want. I also want to tell all the women out there to TRUST YOUR GUT!!Today, I am getting everything I want, after beating myself up for so long on how I didn’t know what was going on, hating myself for taking him back in so many time, believing his stupid ugly face lies and havin>

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